I realize that's a bunch of questions & who knows...possibly you've never had 'real' problems.
Maybe the 'thing' was a real biggie with you but not to anyone else...and they let you know it? Hmm...I have and it's no walk in the park, 'specially when it's just you!
Mother Teresa put it this way,
"Honesty & transparency make you vulnerable. Be honest & transparent anyway."
Why is it (generally speaking) that we are terrified of being honest about ourselves...to be transparent? Maybe you ran into someone like the person I was before I began my renovation; quick to judge...hmm, not a good thing and I'm very ashamed.
Say I'm around when someone divulges a what's to me a 'serious stepping in it' and I pull out my 'bad person that I don't want anything to do with' stamp and wham...branded 'em! And you...you thought I was perfect? Ha, ha! Had you fooled, didn't I. Am I the only person with one of those stamps?
For too many years I worked at digging a hole for myself...I didn't care much about others...I was too busy digging! Why didn't I open up and talk to someone...anyone? Because...I was digging my hole.
Addiction days are over for me...that's past but not forgotten. It no longer overwhelms me to talk about it...to tell my story...tho' at times I still choke up. Oh hey, you might think I'm showboating or trying to establish myself as a resident expert at large...neither one...trust me!
Christ met people where they were in life; no kangaroo court...no mug shots or jail time. He 'felt' for them...He 'cared' for them. Should I do less? No way. I can help others who are hurting...so can you.
I've written much about listening...good to listen and not take charge...like do all the talking. If I'm hurting I can't let it out if no one wants to listen...too busy? Maybe not 'cause
Winnie the Pooh says:“If the person you are talking to doesn't appear to be listening, be patient. It may simply be that he has a small piece of fluff in his ear."
I'm totally into listening and caring what you're wanting to say; I care, I honestly care...a whole lot. God presents opportunities ~ it's up to me to take advantage and reach out.
I reach out to you and know you will do likewise...and you know what? I believe God will smile.
Incidentally, God has no fluff in His ears and he listens, listens, listens...anytime, anywhere! Isn't that the most awesome feeling? Oh yes...yes!
From my heart...